"Society is not ready to accept such children"
Children whom the majority does not want to accept: neither in the garden, nor at school, nor on the playground… From birth, they face a society that is not ready for them. Although there are positive examples: her whole kindergarten group is worried about Ivanka, and Artema loves and congratulates the whole class on her birthday. How to help such angels in society and what they have to face, their parents say. Last weekend our ward Ivanka Karapuz visited the
Telegraph editorial office. Very soon she will celebrate her sixth birthday: she wants a rabbit, a kitten, and very, very much dreams of meeting DZIDZIO. Ivanka is a special girl, for whose life resuscitators had to fight for a week at birth. And then every day to undergo rehabilitation, because the child was born with cerebral palsy. Now she goes to the most ordinary kindergarten and is very happy to be able to play with other children.
"We come home from kindergarten so inspired," says her mother, Yaroslava. - But that boy gave me a pen, and that girl - a toy, I was supported. The child reaches out to other children, takes an example from them, he has motivation. And the parents are wonderful for the children in our group. If we are sick, they are interested in "Oh, Ivannochka, why haven’t you been here for so long." And educators are great. But you come to another kindergarten, and you are immediately sent: "Oh, I don’t know, you need to go to a special garden« "
They do not want to accept a child with special needs in the garden, at school, on the playground, or in society: many parents have faced this. This weekend, several parents of such children gathered at the Telegraph to talk about what they have to go through and how society can help their little angels. We have to constantly fight: to knock out kindergarten, school, social assistance, to fight for an increase in the pension for a child, to fight bureaucrats and a society that does not want to accept their children.
- I know the story of one child who was originally enrolled in a group with cerebral palsy. He had no one to talk to, there were almost no children, - say mothers, guests of the editorial office. - And when at the matinee they were combined with another group, as usual, one mother came out and said - why should my child look at these…
Although there are positive examples. Elena, the mother of 14-year-old Artem, told us about her experience. She was able to get her child to go to regular school. And most importantly, he was well received in class and loved.
- I was told that no such child in the Poltava region goes to secondary school, she says. - I thought: so mine will be the first. By the way, inclusive
education has been introduced in Ukrainian schools this year . We have talked about this many timeswrote. According to the Center for Public Monitoring and Control, the concept of "persons with special educational needs" has appeared in Ukraine. This is a person who needs extra support during education. The number of children who went to regular kindergartens and schools has increased by 25% since September this year.
While my mother talked for an hour and a half visiting the editorial office, Ivanka behaved very diligently. Just about for a child who is about to turn six! Only occasionally did she engage in adult conversations, sharing her plans and dreams. For example, meet DZIDZIO.
"She waved her hand and left."
For the first time, parents face a harsh reality in the maternity hospital.
- When I gave birth to my baby, the doctor waved at her and said: "Yes, there are signs of down," - recalls Tatiana. - My happiness was taken like this and smashed. It’s just a shock to parents. Abroad, when there is a suspicion that a mother may give birth to a child with special needs, they immediately start working with this family. And we say that you will have a freak, a moron: why do you need it, refuse… Then a girl psychologist came to me. And he doesn’t know what to tell me. She gave me tests. She looked, "Well, you’re not so scared," and left. Supported. But all the rest of the staff - nurses, paramedics, treated very well, empathized with us, helped…
- And in my case the doctor played the role of the psychologist, - Yaroslava shares. - When we were transported to Poltava, the doctor told me that I needed to take care of the child. Then I will be able to put him on his feet: every day swimming pool, massage, exercise. I am very grateful for that. Now this is my credo for life.
To help those who may face a similar problem in the future, the mothers gave the maternity hospital contacts of the parents of the "sun children": they can be contacted for support and advice.
"We are already obsessed with this" knocking out… "
What benefits can such children expect, where to go - parents say in one voice that social institutions do not inform them about it. Everything has to be "knocked out" with a fight:
- Usually there is only one answer - you are not entitled to anything. You go to Sobes - you are "football" to the clinic, and from there back to Sobes, and there already to the mayor’s office… Some kind of enchanted circle. But we are provided with free medicines, sanatoriums and diapers… But you really understand that you are not told about all this.
- All this is not talked about because of underfunding, - says Elena, Olga’s mother. - I was told that they are limited in everything. And if they voice it, they will have to give everything, but there will not be enough diapers for everyone ...
Katya is a "sunny child". She became the second child in Tatiana’s family. She recently turned two years old. She is already a little Skoda, who loves to look in the kitchen drawers and is happy to give their sunshine to everyone who communicates with her .
On a personal example .
Elena, the mother of 14-year-old Artem, who is currently studying at school №20, told us about her positive experience. About how the class and society can accept, love and support special children.
- When Artem tells a verse, the whole class applauds after that. Everyone understands that it is difficult for him. This is, of course, the work of a class teacher. After all, as he set up the children, so they belong. He was congratulated on his birthday, although they do not usually celebrate in class. And he, when he entered the classroom, sang a song, gave candy. And one girl drew a congratulatory poster for him at night. It was so nice! I am now proud of Artem’s success and I am grateful to the people who helped us along the way: both the staff of the rehabilitation center and the teachers of our school. I have everything wonderful, I have nothing to complain about… People go to meet, understand, support.
"The most important thing is no pity…"
You say that many do not know how to behave with such children
- The most important thing - without pity, - says Tatiana. - Treat such people as the most ordinary. But come to the rescue if you notice that the person needs it. These can be the simplest things: open the door, skip ahead, help navigate the store. For example, once in a store I met a man who found it difficult to open the package himself to put food in it. I wanted to help, but I saw that he managed. But if he didn’t succeed, I would come and offer help.
- Society should not be afraid of such children, - says Yaroslava. - They are the same ordinary people. Only in something, perhaps, individual. Our society really lacks the understanding that they are the same as us all.
How to set up children to accept children with special needs?
- First of all, this is the task of the educator, how he will set up the children in the team, - says Tatiana. - And, of course, parents who must explain that this is the same child as everyone else who wants to be friends, play and be with children.
Two thousand for two: and do not deny the child anything.
UAH 300 for child care and about UAH 1,600 for a child with the status of a disabled person - that’s how much mothers now receive from the state. Yaroslava says that such an amount is simply incomparable with spending. For example, for the rehabilitation of her Ivanka needed 20 thousand. UAH, then 12 thousand UAH… And at the same time you can not go to work - the child requires constant attention.
- We are drafting a petition to the President to increase the pensions of such children. Now this figure is equated to the subsistence level. We want it to be equated to the minimum wage, and given that both the child and the mother depend on this amount. For now, we are consulting with a lawyer, and then we will send a petition: we will have to collect another 25,000 electronic signatures to be considered, - says Yaroslava, Ivanka’s mother.
Signing a petition is simple: follow the link , register and leave your vote.
Author Victoria Mudraya
Materials " Telegraph "
Telegraph editorial office. Very soon she will celebrate her sixth birthday: she wants a rabbit, a kitten, and very, very much dreams of meeting DZIDZIO. Ivanka is a special girl, for whose life resuscitators had to fight for a week at birth. And then every day to undergo rehabilitation, because the child was born with cerebral palsy. Now she goes to the most ordinary kindergarten and is very happy to be able to play with other children.
"We come home from kindergarten so inspired," says her mother, Yaroslava. - But that boy gave me a pen, and that girl - a toy, I was supported. The child reaches out to other children, takes an example from them, he has motivation. And the parents are wonderful for the children in our group. If we are sick, they are interested in "Oh, Ivannochka, why haven’t you been here for so long." And educators are great. But you come to another kindergarten, and you are immediately sent: "Oh, I don’t know, you need to go to a special garden« "
They do not want to accept a child with special needs in the garden, at school, on the playground, or in society: many parents have faced this. This weekend, several parents of such children gathered at the Telegraph to talk about what they have to go through and how society can help their little angels. We have to constantly fight: to knock out kindergarten, school, social assistance, to fight for an increase in the pension for a child, to fight bureaucrats and a society that does not want to accept their children.
- I know the story of one child who was originally enrolled in a group with cerebral palsy. He had no one to talk to, there were almost no children, - say mothers, guests of the editorial office. - And when at the matinee they were combined with another group, as usual, one mother came out and said - why should my child look at these…
Although there are positive examples. Elena, the mother of 14-year-old Artem, told us about her experience. She was able to get her child to go to regular school. And most importantly, he was well received in class and loved.
- I was told that no such child in the Poltava region goes to secondary school, she says. - I thought: so mine will be the first. By the way, inclusive
education has been introduced in Ukrainian schools this year . We have talked about this many timeswrote. According to the Center for Public Monitoring and Control, the concept of "persons with special educational needs" has appeared in Ukraine. This is a person who needs extra support during education. The number of children who went to regular kindergartens and schools has increased by 25% since September this year.
While my mother talked for an hour and a half visiting the editorial office, Ivanka behaved very diligently. Just about for a child who is about to turn six! Only occasionally did she engage in adult conversations, sharing her plans and dreams. For example, meet DZIDZIO.
"She waved her hand and left."
For the first time, parents face a harsh reality in the maternity hospital.
- When I gave birth to my baby, the doctor waved at her and said: "Yes, there are signs of down," - recalls Tatiana. - My happiness was taken like this and smashed. It’s just a shock to parents. Abroad, when there is a suspicion that a mother may give birth to a child with special needs, they immediately start working with this family. And we say that you will have a freak, a moron: why do you need it, refuse… Then a girl psychologist came to me. And he doesn’t know what to tell me. She gave me tests. She looked, "Well, you’re not so scared," and left. Supported. But all the rest of the staff - nurses, paramedics, treated very well, empathized with us, helped…
- And in my case the doctor played the role of the psychologist, - Yaroslava shares. - When we were transported to Poltava, the doctor told me that I needed to take care of the child. Then I will be able to put him on his feet: every day swimming pool, massage, exercise. I am very grateful for that. Now this is my credo for life.
To help those who may face a similar problem in the future, the mothers gave the maternity hospital contacts of the parents of the "sun children": they can be contacted for support and advice.
"We are already obsessed with this" knocking out… "
What benefits can such children expect, where to go - parents say in one voice that social institutions do not inform them about it. Everything has to be "knocked out" with a fight:
- Usually there is only one answer - you are not entitled to anything. You go to Sobes - you are "football" to the clinic, and from there back to Sobes, and there already to the mayor’s office… Some kind of enchanted circle. But we are provided with free medicines, sanatoriums and diapers… But you really understand that you are not told about all this.
- All this is not talked about because of underfunding, - says Elena, Olga’s mother. - I was told that they are limited in everything. And if they voice it, they will have to give everything, but there will not be enough diapers for everyone ...
Katya is a "sunny child". She became the second child in Tatiana’s family. She recently turned two years old. She is already a little Skoda, who loves to look in the kitchen drawers and is happy to give their sunshine to everyone who communicates with her .
On a personal example .
Elena, the mother of 14-year-old Artem, who is currently studying at school №20, told us about her positive experience. About how the class and society can accept, love and support special children.
- When Artem tells a verse, the whole class applauds after that. Everyone understands that it is difficult for him. This is, of course, the work of a class teacher. After all, as he set up the children, so they belong. He was congratulated on his birthday, although they do not usually celebrate in class. And he, when he entered the classroom, sang a song, gave candy. And one girl drew a congratulatory poster for him at night. It was so nice! I am now proud of Artem’s success and I am grateful to the people who helped us along the way: both the staff of the rehabilitation center and the teachers of our school. I have everything wonderful, I have nothing to complain about… People go to meet, understand, support.
"The most important thing is no pity…"
You say that many do not know how to behave with such children
- The most important thing - without pity, - says Tatiana. - Treat such people as the most ordinary. But come to the rescue if you notice that the person needs it. These can be the simplest things: open the door, skip ahead, help navigate the store. For example, once in a store I met a man who found it difficult to open the package himself to put food in it. I wanted to help, but I saw that he managed. But if he didn’t succeed, I would come and offer help.
- Society should not be afraid of such children, - says Yaroslava. - They are the same ordinary people. Only in something, perhaps, individual. Our society really lacks the understanding that they are the same as us all.
How to set up children to accept children with special needs?
- First of all, this is the task of the educator, how he will set up the children in the team, - says Tatiana. - And, of course, parents who must explain that this is the same child as everyone else who wants to be friends, play and be with children.
Two thousand for two: and do not deny the child anything.
UAH 300 for child care and about UAH 1,600 for a child with the status of a disabled person - that’s how much mothers now receive from the state. Yaroslava says that such an amount is simply incomparable with spending. For example, for the rehabilitation of her Ivanka needed 20 thousand. UAH, then 12 thousand UAH… And at the same time you can not go to work - the child requires constant attention.
- We are drafting a petition to the President to increase the pensions of such children. Now this figure is equated to the subsistence level. We want it to be equated to the minimum wage, and given that both the child and the mother depend on this amount. For now, we are consulting with a lawyer, and then we will send a petition: we will have to collect another 25,000 electronic signatures to be considered, - says Yaroslava, Ivanka’s mother.
Signing a petition is simple: follow the link , register and leave your vote.
Author Victoria Mudraya
Materials " Telegraph "